The Nightside of Character


  A GIFTED and Honourable Editor, who by practice of his profession 
had acquired wealth and distinction, applied to an Old Friend for 
the hand of his daughter in marriage.

  "With all my heart, and God bless you!" said the Old Friend, 
grasping him by both hands.  "It is a greater honour than I had 
dared to hope for."

  "I knew what your answer would be," replied the Gifted and 
Honourable Editor.  "And yet," he added, with a sly smile, "I feel 
that I ought to give you as much knowledge of my character as I 
possess.  In this scrap-book is such testimony relating to my shady 
side, as I have within the past ten years been able to cut from the 
columns of my competitors in the business of elevating humanity to 
a higher plane of mind and morals - my 'loathsome contemporaries.'"

  Laying the book on a table, he withdrew in high spirits to make 
arrangements for the wedding.  Three days later he received the 
scrap-book from a messenger, with a note warning him never again to 
darken his Old Friend's door.

  "See!" the Gifted and Honourable Editor exclaimed, pointing to that 
injunction - "I am a painter and grainer!"

  And he was led away to the Asylum for the Indiscreet.